U.S. Immigration
A Dangerous Journey...
I started writing this piece at an intermittent pace in an Emergency Room in Frisco TX today. An ordeal initiated at 1 pm and unfolded in painful anticipation of test results & final diagnosis. Early indications of Babaβs condition via Chest X-Ray (CXR) depict fluid accumulation in and around both lungs.
I have since learned that a plain olβ chest x-ray can depict the presence of pneumonia and that a Computed Tomography (CT) scan is required for maximizing evaluation accuracy. Apparently we need to rule out other serious medical conditions as COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease), pulmonary embolisms etc.
I left at 8 pm to drop Mama off to eat and rest, and so I too may too finally eat for the day and attempt slumber. Although I feel the latter slipping my churning mind as I continue to work through this βMediterranean saladβ for the past 90 minutes now. But then again I havenβt held an appetite for much these days. Not since December 2023, not since the reality of our demise finally sunk in including this worldβs outwardly cowardly consensusβ¦
Last word of his condition (pending Dr. Phillips return in the am) is a confirmation of excess fluid in both lung cavities and a prognosis of CHFβ¦ Gotta love dem acronymsβ¦ this one spells out Congestive Heart Failure, the blood backs up and forces liquid through capillary wallsβ¦
I share this pain as I have shared others becauseβ¦
It seems unfair to hold all this heartache aloneβ¦
As sombering as it is to watch π΅πΈβs genocide and dissemination, I now have front row seats to my fatherβs deteriorationβ¦ One that serves a different kind of pain altogetherβ¦
I completed my parents immigration paperwork yesterday (including printing all evidence to serve as appendices). Todayβs plan was simple in concept, have them sign it upon my final review. This of course did not happenβ¦
Theyβre supposed to leave this Tuesday night, and that now has been rendered impossible. So tomorrow along with work, hospital visitation and consultation, I orchestrate flight and hotel changeβ¦
But more than all the above is the solemn fact that Baba has (and forever still) holds onto the dream of being an American. The motivation for this trip. A dream akin to a coffin now.
A dream heβs clinged onto since his struggled childhood in Lebanon, the backdrop of my storyβ¦
And well, as Palestinian refugees, the prestige and security of an American citizenship and passport (vs dire refugee travel documents) affords them a security theyβve never known for their respective 79 and 69 years of existence. And as I continue to work so diligently (as this familyβs guardian), I can only hope to realize his dream before his worldly exit as a wholeβ¦
The sad truth is since their arrival Thursday April 4th Iβve been unable to take them anywhere (Babaβs health was comprised from the get-go) and so I only showed them my proposed plans on my laptop (places, friends, etc.)
And so yes, I detest our existence, one forced upon us because we have no homeland to return to. And in the sad attempt to re-create one so as to afford us basic human dignity and right, we still somehow dieβ¦
But what choice do we have? What choice have you (world) afforded us? Ever? And still?
And so yes, I loathe it all. This world, and the pretense of it.
Nothing is certain in our lives! We live in constant change. Hope his dream will comes true and heβll get his papers!